Editor’s Note: This story is developing and will be updated with more details as they come in. Stay tuned to The Benches for the latest news in the Rauhauser saga. 

As mentioned by one of our sources, Neal hasn’t been around much since a certain Anonymous member’s name was in the public eye a couple of weeks ago. Unless of course you count showing up to court hearings in Maryland multiple times as being around, which we at The Benches do not.  We see Neal’s presence in a public place as evidence that he has gone deep underground, because we are schooled in literary theories like deconstruction which enable us to see that people mean the opposite of their statements and actions. Neal coming out in public is Neal going into hiding.

Neal says that he’s been busy spying on Congress, which we believe despite Neal’s long history of lying about, well, everything.  For whom does Neal spy?  We’re working on that. For now, we’ll focus on Neal’s messages to our source Cream. The following exchange took place on April 9th, 2012:

Neal: “Keep in mind policy intel for 700+ Congressional staffers runs through a system I built and I back up the natsec editor. I hear stuff average bear does not.“

Cream: “Are you meant to?”

We will now cite the Constitution’s definition of treason because the above text message provides with a prima facie case for treason against the United States by Neal Rauhauser:

Treason against the United States shall consist only in levying War against them, or in adhering to their Enemies, giving them Aid and Comfort. No Person shall be convicted of Treason unless on the Testimony of two Witnesses to the same overt Act, or on Confession in open Court. The Congress shall have Power to declare the Punishment of Treason, but no Attainder of Treason shall work Corruption of Blood, or Forfeiture except during the Life of the Person attainted.

What sort of system did Neal build for these 700+ Congressional staffers, and who is he referring to when he mentions the natsec editor?  We do not know here at The Benches, but our title clearly states a conclusion we do not support within the body of the story.  Here’s an online forum post mentioning Twitter API and technical problems Neal is having with his system:

From: neal rauhauser
Date: September 1, 2011 23:05
Subject: Serious ExtUtils::MakeMaker bug in 6.58 & 6.59
Message ID:


I use a module called Net::Twitter and it depends on ExtUtils::MakeMaker. I typically run on FreeBSD and I tried this on OpenBSD, too. An ‘install Net::Twitter’ consistently hangs on the creation of MakeMaker.

I have updated CPAN, tried to ‘install ExtUtils::MakeMaker’, and tried to build it using /usr/ports/devel/p5-ExtUtils-MakeMaker. All of them on FreeBSD 6.4, 8.2, and OpenBSD 4.9 fail in a similar fashion, hanging on test 3 of 20 in t/INSTALL_BASE.t

I have Googled a bit and I am not the only one reporting this trouble – is there something else I would need to do beyond this in order to help hunt down this bug? I am moving Friday, but this is getting urgent for me – got a system that 700 Congressional staffers use that depend on this, we’re losing our hosting soon, and I can’t install at a new location

Looks like we can gloat that Mr. Technology is having trouble with his system and make remarks about him outsourcing it to Sweden, Iceland, or Ecuador because those countries are friendly to Wikileaks like operations seeking web hosting.  See what we did there? We insinuated that a system used by 700+ congressional aides is akin or analogous to Wikileaks to drive home the sinister potential of Neal’s system.

This is what passes for reporting at The Benches, because I’m Brooks Drayne and I have such high standards.  Now, if I were Jay Batman, I might look into the above referenced system and realize that it’s the same system Neal built at Progressive Congress News to blast relevant news reports in organized feeds to aides for progressive congressmen.  I might do this, and it would be easy to do, but it would ruin the narrative I’m trying to put forth that a left wing activist is just inches away from triggering a nuclear holocaust or gaining access to secrets with Top Secret classification.

My reckless insinuations might be unfair, and the conclusions I generate might be utterly without foundation, but they serve the purpose of getting traffic to my site, and that’s what this entire cause is all about, right? Getting traffic to my site.  You will notice if you click the link above that it takes you to a page where PCN solicits news stories and says that it has-wait the fuck for it-editors.  Maybe one of those editors is a natsec editor!

And maybe Neal is engaging the kind of puffery he is known for engaging in to inflate his importance and his role,  like he did when he showed up for a local appearance of Charles Grassley to solicit federal subsidies for his big time super duper wind powered ammonia plant that never happened.  He was part of the Stranded Wind Initiative, and not a member of or principal in the company that would actually do the construction and management of the plant!

And given that Progressive Congress News has already been referenced by Crying Wolfe Blog, Bad Journalist, and Robert Stacy McCain, it is inexcusable that we at The Benches couldn’t draw this very reasonable conclusion from the information we received from our super duper covert operative informant that we’ll call CREAM.  Oh, and look at this over at Open Left, where it says that National Security is one of the subjects covered by Progressive Congress News!

So, there are two options: either I, Brooks Drayne, am too incompetent to go out and research these easy to find items in order to provide a more likely narrative that Neal is communicating with CREAM about a news blasting service he designed for congressional staffers; or I am willfully looking the other way to promote what I know is a false narrative from this evidence that Neal Rauhauser has access to national security information and is admitting it in his communication to my super duper covert operative informant CREAM.

Either way, it doesn’t look too good for me, my credibility, or the credibility of The Benches, does it?  It actually looks like fearmongering, and as if I think the ends justify the means because Neal Rauhauser is a leftist and to beat the Left you have to be the Left, right?  Right.

This is a developing story, and we will continue to make specious insinuations and spurious accusations that aren’t even remotely supported by the very evidence we reference in future stories. Here at The Benches, we cover the news that isn’t the news better than anybody else!